MYSTERYSHRINK BANNED IN VEGAS!
Dateline: Las Vegas Branch Office in the Paris Hotel Race and Sports Book.
Goal: The Thinking Guidance System is important, that is the capacity to remember that regardless of the threats, you won’t be sent to prison because you destroyed a city accidentally. 
You’ve heard about the awesome high rollers banned in Las Vegas? The wise guys banned for counting cards or using some other complicated system at the blackjack tables? The just too famous for their own good celebrities banned for their wild antics?
Turns out, getting banned in Vegas is not as nearly as hard as those celebrities make it sound.
Like other Vegas disasters, it started out so innocently, admirably even. While I helped my walking-challenged friend mount the cherry red scooter, people smiled and patted me on the back with their expressions. What a kind woman to help her older friend.
Sounds harmless, right? Maybe even a little bit cute. Cute isn’t the way it turned out.
I didn’t worry so much at first. So Janie smacked that cherry red puppy into the hotel elevator wall pretty good? This is Vegas. They expect a little wear and tear from the guests, right? That’s what I was thinking when I turned around and no Janie. I followed the screams and caught up on the straight-away of the Miracle Mile Shopping Mall.
Forced to walk slower than other people for years, Janie was drunk with power.
STRESS. ONLINE THERAPY. ANXIETY. BETTER RELATIONS 
WITH BOWEN NATURAL SYSTEMS THEORY. FAMILY SYSTEMS. FORGIVE. MARRIAGE. EMOTIONS.
It wasn’t just the casinos. We left a trail of broken glass and colorfully food-smeared diners in the finest restaurants. Even the tough-as-nails time share sellers, who will stand upright on the faces of anyone with a pulse and a credit rating dove out of the line of fire. We flattened walkers on the Las Vegas Strip like a tank whacking trees through a forest.
“You got liability on that thing, sister?” I heard that question more than once. “No time,” I answered. In that brief lapse, Janie shot full speed ahead for the Planet Hollywood. Ten minutes and I found Nascar Nannie alone in the Wheel of Fortune section. I sat down and stuffed in a dollar. “You’re lucky to find a whole area of machines all to yourself in this Saturday night crowd,” I said. A man over in the Elvis section growled, “Well, it didn’t start out that way, lady!”
At one point I drew a line in the sand and insisted on walking ahead of Motorcycle Janie. I abandoned that bright little chunk of genius the third time I had to climb off the back of a downed stranger.
Janie wasn’t hard to follow. Just hone in on the screams rumbling through the casino like the “wave” action at a basketball game. Thus I was there when Janie crashed full throttle into the blackjack table, spraying chips like a confetti explosion and flinging terrified players off their stools. Those tables tip over a lot easier than you might think.
Janie was quite famous after that.
The city claims “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.” The brochures promise anything goes, no behavior will be outlawed or remembered. I say, “Nay! Nay!”
Smash up a couple of slot machines, knock over a few blackjack tables, turn a French bistro into a food fight, and render unconscious a slow moving tourist or two–and Vegas retracts that forgiveness motto like a frog’s tongue sucks up a bug.
