A Psycholgist on the Loose
Archive for August, 2008
Why This Blog
Aug 9th
This blog is devoted to presenting ideas to help in the strugge each of us has to function as a more joyful and more emotionally mature person. To make every moment of the life we’ve been given “better” and to empower others to experience greater joy in life.
Those of you who’ve been here all along know we’re NOT talking some kind of simplistic hedonism–”if it feels good, do it”-routine. Because that way of going about life does not result in long term satisfaction. “If it feels good, do it,” means doing whatever is necessary at the moment to keep ourselves comfortable. To escape anxiety.
Now, of course, we have great rationalizations to justify our lack of thoughtful functioning.
So, this won’t be easy.
Here’s a place to start. While breathing in, say out loud or to yourself, but you must SAY the words, “COOL AIR IN.”
Hold that air a moment, then saying to yourself or out loud, but SAY the words, “WARM AIR OUT,” as you empty your lungs. Sit quietly and repeat this “mini-mediation.”
There, you’re already more emotionally grown up than five minutes ago, because you have proven that YOU ARE IN CHARGE OF YOUR ANXIETY. 
You changed your anxiety level by changing what you were thinking about.
All the body changes were bonuses.
Sensitivity: Good News/Bad News
Aug 3rd
What does it mean when a parent says, “She’s so sensitive?”
Does it mean she’s, INFLEXIBLE, FEARFUL, LIKELY TO EXAGGERATE, LIKELY TO TURN ON HERSELF, LIKELY TO TURN ON OTHERS? (Fearful of what you ask? All those bad things, those waiting-to-get-you thought-streams in your imaginary lint tube. See yesterday.)
Ouch. “Sensitive” doesn’t sound so good.
When others see you as “sensitive,” in what ways do others change their behavior so that YOU DO NOT GET ANXIOUS?
How Dryer Lint Can Ruin Your Life
Aug 1st
Oh yeah. The accumulation of all your leftover junky thoughtstreams about your many failures and weakness. Story later today.
We’ve lived in the same house for years which has a large laundry room on the second level. The dryer, like all, has a removable lint filter (cleaned often) which has behind it a tube leading through the wall to the outside. Sometime during growing up I was told that if you didn’t keep that tube clean, it was a fire hazard. Then I’ve seen thirty foot wire brushes designed to clear that pipe. (Okay, it was that Air Mall catalog always in the front pocket of your seat with the marshmellow gun.) Then there is the occasional unexplained house fire.
Think of this pipe as a room in your brain. This room is full of bad stuff about yourself that you remind yourself about and worry that if enough lint accumulates . . . Oh, who knows? But it will be awful. So we need to worry.
On the occasion of a new dryer I called in a chimney sweep to clear out the pipe, which after all these years, had to be disgusting. I left him to pull the old dryer away from the wall and get to work.
He called me in a few minutes later.
”Clear already?” I asked.
“Yep.” He stepped to the side of the pipe hole in the wall. “Do you see that light, ma’am?”
“Yes.”
“That’s daylight. There’s no pipe here accumulating anything.”
Turns out I made the whole story up.
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